The Ultimate Groom’s Wedding To-Do List
Future Husbands, this one’s for you. Wedding planning is a lot of work, especially if you have opted out on a full-service wedding planner—if so, I recommend you reconsider, I mean it… it’s A LOT of work. For all you ladies planning your wedding it very well could feel like you have a second job, especially if you’re juggling multiple things. Life, school, work, a social life, a baby, a specific routine, and then toss in planning a wedding! There’s a glass-half-full way to take on this wave of potential stress, however: This is your big chance to grow as a couple, a duo whose sum is greater than its parts. You’re entering a marriage and huge part of marriage is team work and communication. Planning the wedding together will start you on the path of making choices and decisions together for the rest of your life, but let’s be real you can’t expect your man to be involved in everything! If he is… than that’s amazing, but picking out linens and color swatches might be something you get the “okay” for and that’s it. And on the other end of the spectrum, as much as you might want to make EVERY single decision, you’ve got to let your hubs pick some aspects of the wedding! It’s all about bringing a vision together which you both want. I’ve put together a list of things that I think all you men out there will enjoy during the planning process, things you will enjoy together. So, you future brides, here are some things I believe you should let your future husband plan on his own! Here we go:
Deciding a venue together is #1. This is the place you will become husband and wife and you both should absolutely love it. It should represent both of you as a couple. Doing venue tours together is a fun experience and makes for a fun day(s). Do it together and decide together!
Make your guest list:
Help your future wife out by making a list of your desired guests, from your closest friends, to all the family members you wish to invite! This will help your wifey so much because she can combine it with her list and then together you can go through it and decide who will be invited, but you can’t expect her to be a mind reader, predicting those who you actually want present at the wedding and there may be old friends and extended family she hasn’t met yet. She also may not know if they have a significant other or if you want them to have a plus one so include that!
Go to the food tastings and give input for the menu:
Who doesn’t love food? Food tastings are like having a couple fancy dinners in one sitting, so it dupes as a date, it’s fun and you both should decide what’s being served at your wedding!
Cocktails and Alcohol:
I love when my couples do signature cocktails, or “his” and “her” drinks so pick your favorite alcoholic drink and help plan the bar! Take the lead on this and pick out the alcohol being served. If your venue allows for BYOB, then be the one to go grab all of the alcohol. You can go into most any liquor store and give your estimated guest count and they should be able to give you a rough estimate of how much alcohol you should be buying.
Provide assistance for any DIY projects:
Gentlemen, crafts are harder than they look. She’s going to be having some late nights, so offer to pick up the supplies and take one thing off her plate; offer any assistance, for example if anything needs to be sealed or painted! Or if you’re a handy man help out! One extra reminder why she’s marrying YOU.
Care about it, it’s important and will complete your wedding photos. Ladies, I think offering guidance in the colors you would like for him and his groomsmen is as far as it should go. This will help him make the right choice but at the end of the day let them pick out their actual suits/tux. Can you imagine if they told you what dress you had to wear? And then picked out your bridesmaid dresses as well…
Write your vows:
If you choose to say personal vows to each other, or decide to read them privately, this is something you should most definitely put a lot of thought and effort into. Don’t cause unnecessary stress for your soon-to-be wife because you aren’t writing them… give her reassurance you’re getting the job done.
Making a playlist is so much fun, and I definitely believe the grooms will enjoy this task. Also, ladies… I think it’s important to let your man pick out his song for the mother son dance if they are doing one. The songs you should pick together should be your first dance and grand entrance! And of course, some of the songs for the reception, but this can be a task you can trust your man to complete. He should know your fav songs to include!
Planning the honeymoon:
I love when I hear the groom has planned an epic honeymoon for his bride! It’s one less thing the bride has to plan and can give something amazing to look forward to after all the wedding planning is over, but I also believe this is something so fun to plan together. Compromise: pick the location together but have him plan out the trip.
Show up at the bridal shower:
Guys I’m telling you this gesture will go a long way! Show up at the bridal shower with a bouquet and say hi. It will mean the world to your future wife, her friends and family.
Plan date nights where you DON’T discuss the wedding:
Don’t lose sight of what this is all about, spending the rest of your lives together. It’s important to take days or night off where you focus on the two of you, and don’t discuss seating charts & rsvp’s and just soak up being engaged. This definitely falls under the category for both of you. Ladies give your man a break where you don’t talk about the wedding. And fellas, plan your lady a romantic night out or in, and just be together and present!
Take into consideration if he wants to do a first look or not:
Communicate if it’s something that matters. Maybe it’s really important to him that he sees you for the first time walking down the aisle. Or maybe to relieve some pressure/stress, he wants to do a first look, but this is a decision to make together. If you are both unsure check out my blog posts ( First Looks & On The Fence About First Looks ) on helping you decide if you should do a first look.
Wedding day gifts:
Show your appreciation and love with a wedding gift to surprise her (big or small it’s the gesture that matters) on the big day! Don’t forget a thoughtful card.
GIVE HER THE BEST KISS EVER:
When the ceremony is over and you are pronounced husband and wife, give it your all… it’s your first kiss as a married couple and will make for the most epic pictures that you’ll cherish for a life time.
These are just a few things to get your man involved and happy during the planning process! It’s a great start on learning how to communicate and get through disagreements in a positive manner. There are so many wedding tasks to accomplish but I really believe there are some things us ladies just know best. But don’t leave your hubby out, and don’t put too much pressure on him to be a part of every decision. Sit down and talk before you start planning, talk to each other regarding things that matter to the both of you. Do those things together! And ladies, suggest these planning tasks to your fiancé and I’m positive he will be on board with most!